Many great things are created by accident: penicillin or killer bees, for example. Ahmed Kazikian’s Fine DiningSM was also born in this manner, when scientists at AKI Labs in Rockford, Virginia attempted to cross-breed the chicken with the axe. Deliciousness Ensued.
As AK FD (not affiliated with the Arkansas fire department) grew from a salmonella-ridden roadside stand to a multi-national chain of 681 restaurants and 23 theme parks, we have trodden on new ground, ground that traditional eateries have not dared to trod (on).
Just consider our track record:
1981: AK FD opens outside AKI labs in Rockford, Virginia1981: First sandwich sold
1981: First alleged case of food poisoning
1981: First alleged death due to food poisoning
1981: First lawsuit
1981: First cash settlement
1981: First closing
1981: First restructuring
1981: First reopening
1990: First restaurant to serve Bald Eagle Hot WingsTM
1990: First restaurant chain ever publicly condemned by every public interest
group in the US and abroad
1990: Bald Eagle Hot Wings renamed Bald Eagle Flavored Hot WingsTM
1990: Surge in patronage
1991: Area Bald Eagle poupulations mysteriously drop to record lows
1998: William Shatner becomes official spokesperson of AK FD
1999: Shatner leaves to become official spokesperson of Priceline.com
2000: Shatner returns to become janitor at AK FD’s Kansas City location.
Pets.com sock puppet celebrates
2003 (projected): AK FD named official restaurant chain of Al Qaeda
2004 (projected): Bin Laden named official spokesperson of AK FD
2006 (projected): World Domination
Now, Ahmed Kazikian’s Fine DiningSM presents its latest innovation, the seamless fusion of world-class cuisine and third-class ambiance. We are proud to present “Tasteful Cuisine in a Tasteless Atmosphere.” To view a menu and book reservations, please click here.
Imagine the possibilities! Witness the future! Come to AKI®.
Questions or comments: ahmed@kazikian.tk.
©2003 Ahmed Kazikian Industry®
