Standard Criteria for High School Physics Teachers

-sent by Clifford Swartz

 

 

Over-Qualified

Certifiable

Needs Summer

Institute

Should be Promoted to Assistant Principal

Science Content

First Semester

Solves inclined plane problems using the Lagrangian and second law of thermodynamics.

Can solve most inclined plane problems using Newton's laws and trig.

Can reproduce an inclined plane force diagram, but only if q = 30° and there is no friction.

Is not inclined to use planes at all; prefers to go by car.

Science Content

Second Semester

Can solve battery and bulb problems using Thevenin's theorem and Maxwell's equations.

Can use Ohm's law in all three forms.

Has trouble getting bulb lighted.

Was once shocked by a flashlight battery and no longer fools around with them.

Recall of

Methods Courses

Has doctorate in psychology as well as in physics. As a boy, studied with Piaget.

Knows that Binet did not go to Stanford.

Has an IQ close to 100 and is mighty proud of it.

Has one standard deviation and several unusual ones.

School Staff

Citizenship Attitude

Has successfully formed student cooperative corridor and toilet patrols.

Was military policeman.

Uses guard dog.

Afraid to go to the bathroom.

Professional Orientation

Past President of both the American Association of Physics Teachers and NSTA.

Member of AAPT and NSTA, but behind in dues.

AAPT would not accept membership application.

Neither would NSTA.

Attitude Toward

Students

Noted for love of children. In 10 years voted most popular teacher 12 times.

Works with Cub Scouts. Has never struck a child except in self defense.

Hates most children.

Loves children, but has not been caught.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Parabolic Trajectory Versus Reality

-sent by Clifford Swartz

Weapon

Max Range (m)

(m)

Muzzle Velocity

(m/s)

Projectile Mass (kg)

M-14 Rifle (7.62 mm)

3725

74,000

853

0.0101

M-16 Rifle (5.56 mm)

2653

100,000

991

0.0036

45 Cal. Pistol (11.4 mm)

1500

7000

262

0.0162

40 mm Grenade

400

590

76

0.23

81 mm Mortar

3736

5900

240

4.24

4.2 inch Mortar

5605

9100

299

11.8

105 mm Howitzer

11,209

23,000

478

15

155 mm Howitzer

14,946

33,000

569

44

8 inch Howitzer

17,251

36,000

595

90